Rotten Reviews: Kratom

My Kratom Review

Every few years, a company will drop the latest “miracle” turd and for an exorbitant amount, it’ll be ingested by the masses. During a brief and silly-lucrative window of opportunity, the product will rake in millions.

Why are so many suckers throughout the West that can’t part with their money fast enough?


An over-represented abundance are simply sheep, vigorously dragged through life by an external current, beaten and bruised by its unforgiving undertow.

They are desperately searching for answers, to try to make sense of it all, so they cling to bullshit miracle cures. Shit to make your dick longer, make you smarter, relieve all your pain, you fucking name it.

This brief window will eventually slam shut, smashing a multitude of curious fingers, and finally be declared certifiable bullshit.

There has been one product that has received its fair share of hype and until recently, I had simply looked past it. It’s called Kratom, and I had unintentionally backed into its fanbase.

I had been hearing about the benefits of Kratom for some time now on YouTube, the likes of Joe Rogan, and so forth. I was buying vape juice one day, at a newly opened store, when I noticed that they had Kratom.

So, I said fuck it, I told the portly Indian guy that I was looking for an added boost of energy and heard good things about Kratom. He had mistakenly sold me Red Vein Kratom when he should have sold me the White Vein.

For a little over a week, I was ingesting smallish doses of Red Vein but hadn’t really felt a significant increase in energy. Until this moment, I’d been suffering from sharp and intense shoulder pain, due to my job.

Upon my switch to the proper vein of Kratom, I had reviewed the effects of the red and suddenly realized that I hadn’t felt the intense shoulder pain since a day or two after taking Red Vein.

Anyway, blah, blah, blah, it’s worth trying if you are attempting to combat pain, fatigue, anxiety, and a whole host of other shit. Do your research and document the dosages and subsequent effects in a journal.

Kratom review is a B+

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